Professor Paletz was my Duke thesis advisor in 1985. He wrote my PhD program recommendation that won me a full fellowship to the Annenberg School of Communications in Los Angeles.
My experience having you as my college thesis advisor has shaped how I think.
You liked to describe me as a “velvet glove with an iron grip,” but I came to know you as the tough work glove lined with velvet—formidable at first, then warm, funny, and fiercely loyal once a student won your respect. It did take me four months of weekly meetings to persuade you to serve as my thesis advisor, since I had the audacity to ask you when I had never taken one of your famous hard courses. In retrospect, you were simply testing both my intellect – and my persistence .
My whole family fondly remembers meeting you at my Duke gradation. My very polite Southern parents asked where I should go next. With that mischievous twinkle, you recommended USC—not just for the program, but so “a nice Southern girl” could experience “the fleshpots of Los Angeles.” Their politely shocked faces were priceless, and you enjoyed every second.
During graduate school, you sent your son Gabriel to stay with me while exploring programs in L.A. I got to show him the “fleshpots” you teased about including your old Poinsettia Lane apartment.
A few years later, you returned from a month in Europe, found my wedding invitation buried in your mail, and still turned up at the reception the next day—gift in hand, knowing no one.